Just like Yesterday
I can still remember this day five years ago as if it were yesterday. I was getting ready for work and passed by the television set just in time to see the first plane slam into the World Trade Center on Good Morning America. I had just recently realized how close New York was to Washington D.C. (My daughter had just moved to D.C. three months before and was telling me how close New York was and how wonderful it would be to take a 3-4 hour trip and be in New York City) At first I thought what a tragic accident. Then as I stood there I saw the coverage as the second plane went into the second tower. This was definitely no accident. Then the news broadcast a statement that they were tracking a plane heading up the Potomac. I knew that was going towards D.C. Then the Pentagon was mentioned. All of this was too close to home. My daughter worked in D.C. not too far from the White house and lived in Arlington not too far from the Pentagon.
The fear and protective instinct of a mom went into overdrive. I was ready to call my daughter and tell her to get in her car and come home. She was too far away, and should have never moved to D.C. It was only an 18 hour drive. The thought of her being in that situation with no family was truly devastating to me and I have since learned for her as well. I even toyed with the idea of going up there to bring her home. (Those who know her would laugh. Yea right you are going to make her do something she does not want to do).She is my daughter no matter how old she was and I wanted her home with us. That was a terrible time for me - Not to be able to be there to hug her and try and comfort her. To know she was scared and there was no one there to be with her. (she had not had time to make any real friends yet)
It reminded me of the time my oldest son was going off to college for the first time (one and one half hours away) A hurricane was headed our way and going right to where he was. I would call and say "Come home" - call back and say "No stay where you are. You are safer not on the roads". - call back and say - "Come home" Talk about a Looney Tune! (like the old comic episode -Take him out, Leave him in, Take him out) Anyway, I just tried not to think about it and low and behold the hurricane turned and missed him. Thank you Jesus! It came and got us just as he was walking in the back door. We get a laugh out of this quite a lot. We had no electricity water, etc for a couple of days. No electricity in our part of the country in late august is not fun or comfortable.
I was glued to the television set for hours and hours. The nation was in a state of shock. I remember going to a church service at noon a couple of days later and weeping as I stood and felt the pain and anguish of the family members who lost loved ones in a split second. They lost loved ones as they were going about their every day lives, going to work, dropping of children, going to the bank. Just the ordinary things that they do every day - normal everyday things.
I was especially moved and angry because it was at this particular time that I was once again traveling on a road I did not want to be on. One of my children was heavily involved with drugs and was spiraling way out of control. I was so angry at him - How could he do this? Here were thousands of innocent people going about their everyday life and they were taken away from their families and loved ones. They never had a chance. Here he was having every chance imaginable and he was throwing them away. I remember being in the back of that catholic church and crying uncontrollably at the pain and heartache I felt and how at times feeling it should have been him. Then I would feel selfish for crying for myself at this time when so many families were in a state of shock and unbelief and pain. My loved one was still alive.
They say hindsight is always best and today I know that things happened as they did for a reason. I may never know the reason why my child who was not living a "good" life was allowed to live and those who were living "good" lives were taken in 9-11. I do know that everything that happens is all part of the bigger picture which in my tiny human brain I will never see or comprehend.
I do pray for the families of all of the victims of this event. I pray that today as they relive the events of that day 5 years ago that the pain in their heart is not as piercing, the tears are not as plentiful and there is a peace in their spirit that surpasses all human understanding. When that happens we know that we have opened our heart to let God in. He has always been there, knocking, we just have to open the door.
I thank God for my family - every single one of them. I pray I will be a good steward of the relationships He has blessed me with. I hope and pray that my family and friends know beyond a shadow of a doubt how important they are to me and how much I treasure them.
em
The fear and protective instinct of a mom went into overdrive. I was ready to call my daughter and tell her to get in her car and come home. She was too far away, and should have never moved to D.C. It was only an 18 hour drive. The thought of her being in that situation with no family was truly devastating to me and I have since learned for her as well. I even toyed with the idea of going up there to bring her home. (Those who know her would laugh. Yea right you are going to make her do something she does not want to do).She is my daughter no matter how old she was and I wanted her home with us. That was a terrible time for me - Not to be able to be there to hug her and try and comfort her. To know she was scared and there was no one there to be with her. (she had not had time to make any real friends yet)
It reminded me of the time my oldest son was going off to college for the first time (one and one half hours away) A hurricane was headed our way and going right to where he was. I would call and say "Come home" - call back and say "No stay where you are. You are safer not on the roads". - call back and say - "Come home" Talk about a Looney Tune! (like the old comic episode -Take him out, Leave him in, Take him out) Anyway, I just tried not to think about it and low and behold the hurricane turned and missed him. Thank you Jesus! It came and got us just as he was walking in the back door. We get a laugh out of this quite a lot. We had no electricity water, etc for a couple of days. No electricity in our part of the country in late august is not fun or comfortable.
I was glued to the television set for hours and hours. The nation was in a state of shock. I remember going to a church service at noon a couple of days later and weeping as I stood and felt the pain and anguish of the family members who lost loved ones in a split second. They lost loved ones as they were going about their every day lives, going to work, dropping of children, going to the bank. Just the ordinary things that they do every day - normal everyday things.
I was especially moved and angry because it was at this particular time that I was once again traveling on a road I did not want to be on. One of my children was heavily involved with drugs and was spiraling way out of control. I was so angry at him - How could he do this? Here were thousands of innocent people going about their everyday life and they were taken away from their families and loved ones. They never had a chance. Here he was having every chance imaginable and he was throwing them away. I remember being in the back of that catholic church and crying uncontrollably at the pain and heartache I felt and how at times feeling it should have been him. Then I would feel selfish for crying for myself at this time when so many families were in a state of shock and unbelief and pain. My loved one was still alive.
They say hindsight is always best and today I know that things happened as they did for a reason. I may never know the reason why my child who was not living a "good" life was allowed to live and those who were living "good" lives were taken in 9-11. I do know that everything that happens is all part of the bigger picture which in my tiny human brain I will never see or comprehend.
I do pray for the families of all of the victims of this event. I pray that today as they relive the events of that day 5 years ago that the pain in their heart is not as piercing, the tears are not as plentiful and there is a peace in their spirit that surpasses all human understanding. When that happens we know that we have opened our heart to let God in. He has always been there, knocking, we just have to open the door.
I thank God for my family - every single one of them. I pray I will be a good steward of the relationships He has blessed me with. I hope and pray that my family and friends know beyond a shadow of a doubt how important they are to me and how much I treasure them.
em
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